Wednesday, November 18, 2009

John Healey, Sexiest Man Alive Runner-Up

After savin' a little coin recently, I went out to the local men's store to buy me a new blazer 'cause my old one has seen better days and started to smell like the jail house funk. Anyhoo, as I'm checkin' out the fit in the mirror by the dressing rooms, I justa 'bout choked on my toothpick as I saw John Healey staring back at me from a picture on the wall. As I'm getting a better look at the picture, the salesman walks up to see how I'm doin' and I ask him about the picture. The salesman says, "That's John Healey, Ft. Bend County District Attorney. He comes in here all the time. He models for us." You don't say. I was grinning from ear to ear as I knew exactly where that picture was going to be posted.

Is it just me or do y'all hear the soundtrack to "Staying Alive" by the Bee Gees, too?

"Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk,
I'm a woman's man, no time to talk.
Music loud and women warm.
I've been kicked around since I was born.
And now it's all right, it's O.K.
And you may look the other way.
We can try to understand
The New York Times' effect on man.
Whether you're a brother
Or whether you're a mother,
You're stayin' alive, stayin' alive."
- Bee Gees

Monday, October 26, 2009

I Respect Nuts

Courage. Bravery. Guts. These words all have the same meaning for most of us. However, when I say "That boy has nuts!"...well, it brings a smile and nodding admiration to those of us that recognize the trait. Who is that boy you ask? He is none other than Lil' McDougal. Yep, Larry's boy. What did he do that caused him to almost expose his genitalia? He tried a DWI case the other week.

What's the big deal, huh? Class B misdemeanor, right?

He tried the case with his 3rd year bar card! First chair in CCL#1. Of course, Big Larry was sitting close by to direct his boy should he meander down the wrong path a little too far. Let me put this into perspective. Most of us lawyers were answering discovery or doing research for some nonexistent emergency that only occurred in our mind when we were third year law students. This kid jumped in the deep end with no floaties.

Did he get the two word verdict? Who cares! He's got what most prosecutors fear most...a defense attorney with NUTS!!!

Way to go Lil' McDougal.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Deposition Disaster



I saw this for the first time in law school as an example of how a deposition can go horribly wrong. I think interrogatories are the way to go.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Back In The Saddle

Geez. I never intended to be away from my blogging duties for so long. I love Summer. Now that it's in the rear view, I guess it's time to hit it.

I've got so much material I could write about that I don't even know where to start. I could share the story about Prosecutor Harry Potter of the Ft. Bend County DA's Office losing a testicle by Judge Lowery a couple of months ago. What did he do that was so bad? Well, it seems Harry Potter's idea of seeking justice in an Assault D/V case was to ask Defense Counsel prior to the jury being brought in, if he had relayed the state's most recent offer to his client (to plead) even after speaking to the key witness the night before who made it clear that the defendant hadn't intentionally struck the complainant. Instead of calling the Judge and the defense attorney that night after receiving this Brady evidence and giving the Judge heads up that the jury would not be needed (as it had been picked the day before) and that he was going to dismiss, Harry Potter walked into court and had the nuts to urge Defense Counsel to again extend the offer to the defendant in a case he knew he couldn't prove. I hear that's when the fireworks went off. The Judge let him have it with both barrels.... on the record. It was clear the Judge thought Harry Potter should have interviewed the key witness in the case prior to the day before trial...preferably before a jury was picked. If he had done so, he could have saved the County's resources by dismissing the case.

Now one testicle later, Harry Potter has been treading lightly around CCL #3.

Next, I got myself roped into managing another baseball team this year for Lamar Little League. Now don't get me wrong, I love doing it. The problem comes when you add washed-up former athletes and overbearing parents into the mix. The washed-up former athletes prowl the field giving pointers to the kids (including mine) and the parents yell instructions to their kids as if any one of them can distinguish one parent's feeble scream from the other 50 adults sitting in the stands. It's enough to give me a twitch. With that said, I'm sure I'll re-up next season.

Well, my next issue has to do with Bail Bond Companies. Most of them here in Rose-Rich (that's Rosenberg-Richmond to you city folk) are truly good companies and have a good bedside manner when it comes to their clients (See Donna at Speedy Gonzales Bond Co.). That's not so with one little ol' place just a stone's throw from the Travis Building. It seems one of my clients was advised by some new hire at little ol' place that it was my responsibility to advise my client that he needed to bring by his signed order of dismissal to them after I got his case thrown out. Huh? Since when do attorneys have any obligation to bonding companies to do jack!!! Instead, how 'bout I shed some light on the illicit relationships particular bonding companies have with some members of the defense bar.

There I go again gettin' all worked up.

Anyhoo, I'm glad to have gotten some of these things off my chest. Don't worry. I don't plan to go on another extended holiday for awhile.

By the way, can someone tell me if Prosecutor Gaines has had that baby yet. If not, she must have the gestation period of an elephant. I swear she was full term before Summer started.

'Til next time y'all.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

No, I Ain't Dead. I'm Just Breakin'!

My apologies. I know it's been a long while since my last post. What can I say...I've been workin' and enjoyin' my Summer. Justice On The Brazos will be taking a break until such time as I feel good 'n ready.

Until then, visit my blog loop 'cept you won't find Life After Esq no more. She dun got herself in lots 'o trouble.

Monday, June 8, 2009

TCDLA Wrap Up

The Texas Criminal Defense Lawyers Association's annual Rusty Duncan seminar wrapped up over the weekend. Of course, there were the big name attorneys that spoke like Gerry Spence and "Racehorse" Haynes who gave the usual talks about their career ("Racehorse" said it was ok that I wear boots in court, I checked). However, one of the best talks came from a personal injury lawyer from Austin, Dicky Grigg.

Mr. Grigg's topic was titled "Guantanamo: It Is Not About Them - It Is About Us." Let me say that I was moved by his talk. I had never been so attentive in my life. I think he cured me of my ADD, albeit for only 45 minutes.

Mr. Grigg is a volunteer member of the "Guantanamo Bar Association" organized by the Center for Constitutional Rights to do what they can on behalf of the Guantanamo detainees. His clients have been Afghan "dirt farmers" who were not captured in combat but were turned over to the U.S. by Afghan or Pakistani "bounty hunters," like 90% of the Guantanamo prisoners, who originally numbered about 750.

Mr. Grigg told of his trip to the U.S. Naval Station at Guantanamo Bay to meet his first client, Mohammad Akhtiar. Akhtiar, a 56 year-old Afghan father of nine, had been held without a trial for three years. He was accused of launching a rocket attack on U.S. troops in 2003. Grigg said Akhtiar denied these charges insisting that he was in Pakistan at the time. He also claimed to be a supporter of the United States who fought the occupying Soviet Army in the 1980s and opposed the Taliban as part of the Northern Alliance in 2001. However, a tribunal of U.S. military officers, meeting in secret after a hearing that included Akhtiar, confirmed Akhtiar's status as an enemy combatant in November 2003.

Akhtiar was caught in a legal battle over where to draw the line between protecting Americans from terrorism and safeguarding constitutional rights. After 9/11, President Bush declared the captured men enemy combatants not subject to U.S. laws or treaties such as the Geneva Conventions, which set protections for prisoners of war.

The "Guantanamo Bar Association" clashed with the Bush administration over where to draw the line between combating terrorism and safeguarding constitutional rights — producing a U.S. Supreme Court ruling in June 2006 that allowed detainees to petition for writs of habeas corpus, which challenge the legality of detentions, in federal court. The Republican-led Congress, saying classified information could be placed at risk in federal court proceedings, followed with legislation stripping federal courts of authority to hear cases from Guantanamo in the Military Commissions Act. The MCA was another attempt to deny detainees the right to a fair hearing to challenge their detention.

In Boumediene v. Bush, 553 U.S. (2008), the Center for Constitutional Rights challenged the Military Commissions Act. On June 12, 2008, the Supreme Court held that the part of the MCA that blocked the federal courts from hearing habeas corpus claims of detainees at Guantanamo was unconstitutional and that procedures set out by the Detainee Treatment Act of 2005 are an inadequate substitute for habeas.

Mr. Grigg spoke of the details that nagged at him after his one meeting with his new client. Prosecutors say Akhtiar's membership in the Itihad Islami military force is evidence of connection to a terrorist group. However, Itihad Islami was a U.S. ally in ousting the Taliban from power in Afghanistan, and its name does not appear on the State and Homeland Security departments' lists of terror organizations. His client told of numerous interrogation techniques without emotion until he spoke of being stripped in front of women. "When he talked about that, his voice cracked, and his eyes filled with tears. I mean, you could feel the humiliation," Grigg said. But Grigg's lasting impression of the interview came toward the end, when Akhtiar asked how he was being paid. Griggs said he wasn't. "He got emotional, and teared up, and he took my hand and thanked me profusely and asked Allah to bless me," Grigg said. "And that was extemely moving for me. Going down there and doing this was the most moving experience I've ever had as a lawyer."

Mr. Grigg ended his talk with a quote from Lieutenant Commander Charles Swift, "The question is not, will we survive Guantanamo, because of course we will survive Guantanamo. The question is: Will we survive Guantanamo as a great nation?" Lieutenant Commander Charles Swift was appointed to represent detainee Salim Ahmed Hamdan before the U. S. Supreme Court and was forced out of the Navy after successfully representing Hamdan.

Not to leave you hanging, Akhtiar was among 17 Guantanamo detainees transferred December 16, 2006 to five nations based on recommendations from U.S. military review boards. He was immediately released by the Afghan government and has reunited with his wife and nine children.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Funny Pic


Encountered this slow moving station wagon on my way in to work this morning. Yes, that's bread.